I've never been keen on the "blog" scene. I guess many would see it as a online diary. I just need to find a place to jot down whats going on in this mystery in my head.
I put in Weather Man tonight, what a depressing movie. Most people would put in a moive to waste time, wind down. Me....I just wanted to distract. I guess I wanted to distract my mind. I'm not sure why I feel this anxiety right now. Is it is big job that may be lingering on my doorstep that I feel I am in no way qualified for? Who knows... All I can tell right now is that it's one of my main focal points.
I tried to ask myself. What is the problem? Why am I feeling this pressure. My job is easy... Or I see it that way. Yet. I feel so tired all the time. Why? What is draining my energy? I read positive books on attitude. I focus myself right before work. Yet, I am distracted. Maybe it's becuase I feel my staff below me is more qualified that I. It's probably true. I'm very new to this whole concept.
You ever have that feeling that someone is just being extra nice to you so you don't feel alienated? That how I feel every day. But for some reason they just keep promoting me? WHY? What the hell? Do they want me to fail. Or am I just letting this happen?
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